Title: the gratitude of a abused mother

Today is a big day….

It should feel like a big day…i think i should celebrate even…but very quietly. The controller is watching and laying several obstacles. He does not want my children to be happy. I realized for sure today morning, ihave proof. He does not care for them, thats for sure. He withheld important information regarding school and then blamed me for making my own plans. Hehe

Oh…i saw the sinister smile that said…fuck you bitch…i control you”

But he doesn’t know the little miracle that happened today morning…

……..

A little miracle happened this morning….

My younger daughter has last exam today and in the mornings, she will be playing some music or the other and humming and chilling.

Today,

She was playing the Toms diner song this morning…(i discovered this song in Kansas in 1993 and have been very fond of singing along …once upon a time)

I paused in my steps ….a smile of recognition spreading on my face….And i sat beside her to listen…

Shesasked me if i remembered this song from when we lived in America…when she was 3 yrs old.

I said….yes…i remember now!

She started speaking…. reminded me how i used to play this song n work along and she would be playing with the 50 puppy toys on the window sill…watching the cold from the window…

She reminded me!!
I rememebered…a memory came and another followed…. damn…

I said to my little saviour angel, my 15 year old… …

i was a good mother once upon a time ey…?

…..And we both smiled wide….the Tom’s Diner played in the far off distance…

I will leave a legacy in my stories ….when i die. Just like my dad left me with so many stories to tell…

That is a peaceful thought for me today.

I am filled with gratitude to be alive today and to be given a chance to be a mother.

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